Friday funnies

Friday Funnies

Something we can all be reminded of now and again – work does come to an end.  So if these are true – what happens to physiotherapists, nurses, occupational therapists, psychologists and social workers?  Contributions more than welcome!

Lawyers are disbarred.
Ministers are defrocked.
Electricians are delighted.
Far Eastern diplomats are disoriented.
Drunks are distilled.
Alpine climbers are dismounted.
Piano tuners are unstrung.
Orchestra leaders are disbanded.
Artists’ models are deposed.
Cooks are deranged.
Dressmakers are unbiased.
Nudists are redressed.
Office clerks are defiled.
Mediums are dispirited.
Programmers are decoded.
Accountants are discredited.
Holy people are disgraced.
Pastry chefs are deserted.
Perfume makers are dissented.
Butterfly collectors are debugged.
Students are degraded.
Electricians are refused.
Bodybuilders are rebuffed.
Underwear models are debriefed
Painters are discolored.
Spinsters are dismissed.
Vegas dealers are discarded.
Mathematicians are discounted.
Tree surgeons disembark.

Never inclined to disappoint fans, SuperTherapist has advice on job stability:

Friday Funnies


SuperTherapist has been on the job, and passes on these tips to make your days go well!

Can you tell I’m procrastinating?

You know, I have seen worse clangers – like the neurosurgeon who said ‘I have no knowledge of psychology, but I’m sure if you ask them to assess [Joe Bloggs] they will write you a lengthy report that you can’t understand…’

And this one is because I will be The Perfect Mother – one day – and to do so I will need SuperTherapist’s gear. Or something in the form of liquid refreshment. Child of my Womb is coming to stay the night and sew a dress. I may go grey before the night is over. But I will be grey and fat because we both luuuuurve chocolate!

Friday funnies!

My world may have been rocked by the late-night quakes, but my humour remains THE SAME! Sorry.
I was talking to SuperTherapist the other day, and she whispered some sayings to help maintain that sense of calm and serenity that is necessary when returning to work after a week away. I’m not so sure this was all that helpful...”Be patient and achieve all things. Be impatient and achieve all things faster.”
Neither were these, probably…

Be aware of your body.
Be aware of your perceptions.
Keep in mind that not every physical
sensation is a symptom of a terminal illness.

To practice Zen and the art of therapeutic
motorcycle maintenance, do the following:
get rid of the motorcycle.
What were you thinking? – and you’ve run out of duct tape.

Friday Funnies

I’m not running out of ideas, just running out of time, so today’s FF’s are not original.  If anyone is the copyright owner of these and doesn’t want them on here, please let me know – they’ve arrived (usually) via someone else’s email!

Working in a sometimes management-heavy workplace I wonder if there is a manual that tells managers to use the word ‘team’…

Can you tell how much Manly Jack loves me? he thought this would be a good idea…

And if you’re looking for some total idiocy for the day, head to ‘Sleep Talkin’ Man’ – this man makes more sense asleep than some of our politicians do when they’re wide awake!

I’m off to our favourite spot north of Christchurch – here’s a peek at what we see there.

Friday Funnies!

It’s Friday here in Christchurch – only a few more jobs to do and then it’s gin and tonic time!
I could not resist this – so my apologies to anyone who groans as a result. It’s not my fault I was raised with one of the world’s worst punsters…

And I know, this is sad but oh so true…

Don't mind me, it's the triple espresso talking

Never get between me and my coffee cup. Never.

Friday Funnies

SuperTherapist is having a bit of a lie down with a cold compress, the weekend can’t come soon enough! For a guide to interpreting what she’s really saying, look no further:
We need                                                            I want
It’s your decision                                         The correct decision should be obvious by now
Do what you want                                        You’ll pay for this later
I’m not upset                                                  Of course I’m upset, you moron.
I heard a noise                                               I noticed you were almost asleep.
You have to learn to communicate     Just agree with me.
Are you listening to me!?                          [Too late, you’re dead.]
I’m not yelling!                                              Yes I am yelling because you’re NOT LISTENING.

SuperTherapist’s idea of Good Exercise for this weekend

…and SuperTherapist has worked out that this is NOT a joke, it’s simply the Truth.

Friday Funnies!

Here in New Zealand it is most definitely Friday in mid-winter.  As regular readers will know, I’m not one given to recommend medications – but in deepest, darkest winter there comes a time whenI think it’s wise to consider effective treatments for our winter blues.

…This one works for kids too!

And I’m prescribing this one for my daughter, because she’s too smart to put up with dumb boys.  And I’m too young to be a grandma.

Have a great weekend!